A Few of the Seven Deadlies

Well, which of the seven you ask? For me, today, the first sin of choice is gluttony. I have been gluttonous and boy am I paying for it now. We have these monthly "staff" lunches at work were there is always food 'o plenty. Our Provost will be retiring at the end of 2006 and the entire University has these goals to meet "for him" before he retires. Each month, we rip numbers off a tally sheet to show how far we've come, then we "break bread" together. Today's meal? A scrumptiously catered Olive Garden lunch, complete with Lasagna, Fettucine, tossed salad and all the bread sticks you could eat (or, in my case, scarf down in an uncontrollable frenzy). I, of course, had my fill and then some. Now, I'm sitting at my computer straining to keep my head from hitting the keyboard. I knew when I'd overdone it, but I just kept going. This is definitely not the time to do this, with my belly as big as it is now. There's no room for all that food! The baby is treating my organs like punching bags because of it. Believe me, I've learned my lesson.

Speaking of "big bellies", my belly is the object of fear again. It's just blowing my mind how horny I am all of the time and my hubby is terrified to do anymore than mutual oral (which he loves, so no complaints there). Not that I'm complaining it's just that I do like the regular poking (sorry, too graphic?). He's actually said, "I don't want to dent the baby's head," which, everyone knows, is absolutely ridiculous. He even knows it's ridiculous! Granted, my "hang time" isn't very good and I'm probably not nearly as much fun in my current condition, but that doesn't mean I don't need it. Ugh! It's so frustrating! I'm lusting after my husband and he can't handle it. (deadly sin number two)

So, because of my condition, I'm envious of those who can do what I can't right now. (Number three...) As I've said before, my looks are fairly decent, but my body has gotten me everywhere. Now, I look at people who've got a shape (at least a waist) and I'm like, "Dammit! I had a waist once, too. I've got pictures to prove it! Here, let me whip up a slideshow so you can see how mad-sexy I used to be. Look! Just look!! I used to be limber and could contort into all sorts of fun positions. Don't judge me because, right now, I can only maintain missionary for five seconds, I've still got it! Just give me a few months, after this baby comes" (Oh, and I will so be back on the Ebonyechantress page, documenting the weightloss when the time comes. You can believe that!)

Okay, so I know it's for the greater good and I am, after all, growing a baby. I guess I've hit that stage where the body is just tired of being pregnant. I looked and I'll be 8-months prego as of Thursday of this week. Eight-freakin'-months (that means only four more weeks until full term, for those who don't feel like counting). Our president (during the lunch) also announced that we will be having a joint, company party, to be held on December 19th at the Wells Fargo Tower on the 23rd floor. For every year, up until last year, we had all-staff parties at some fancy-schmancy location. Last year, they tried dividing up the departments, putting each department in charge of it's own, individual party. A bad idea from the onset. It caused a lot of friction (because some departments have bigger budgets than others) and frustration (because some people don't like the people in their own departments. How can you expect to get all decked out and fabulous, then party with people you don't like?) Anyway, we were all relieved to hear that the party was combined and that we'd all be together. Then, the date began to ring true for me: I can just see it now...me, riding up the elevator on December 19th (my 37th week of pregnancy...month 9) in my most fabulous maternity evening wear, complete with glittering accessories and hair to die for. Just as we approach the seventeenth floor, my water breaks and hubby has a panic attack. We quickly push the main floor button, but not before getting to the 23rd floor where meandering guests get a nice view of a woman who looks like she's just peed all over herself. Lovely! And, of course, to complete the evening, the weather will decide to act fruity and dump 6 or 7 inches while hubby flies at 90 miles an hour to our hospital, located thirty miles away.

I'm so positive today! I guess deadly sins will do that to a person.