My Sister, My Soror

This past weekend was my alma mater's homecoming. I would link to the page, but I'm so embarrassed by the new design that I've chosen not to. It was great site before...now it just looks cheesy. Ughh! (Okay, so I went back and linked to it anyway...after all that, some may want to see it.) Anyway, my sorority sisters planned an event in honor of all the homecoming festivities. Several years worth of lines came out, as far back as 1975 so I'm told.

A little history - My mother is a Delta, so I've heard about Deltas most of my life. I equated them with class, style and intelligence. Because I was such a big fan of my mother's, I figured I'd be an idiot not to pledge and follow in her footsteps. I came here to Utah, the summer before Rush, and worked my butt off to raise the money to pledge. Rush came that fall and I was sooo nervous, but I was granted an invitation to join. Granted, an invitation doesn't mean that you can be a member, so I still had major anxiety. I've said in my 100 things about me that I'm a born leader, but know how to follow, right? Well, after the many weeks of drama, stress and pressure from pledging, I finally crossed the burning sands and rejoiced in my victory. Little did I know how much work would be involved afterwards.

Our line was in crisis from the beginning and our chapter had been put on probation. Many of the girls on my line were graduating that spring and many more the year after. We needed desperately to bring a line over before there was no one left to do it. So, here we are on probation with a huge, University checklist to complete before we could do anything. Then, with our regionals, they had their own demands. I was financial secretary at the time, so my role wasn't huge, but I put in my hours. Believe that! Workshop after workshop, form after form, we crossed all our "t's" and dotted all of our "i's" in hopes of being able to call ourselves an "active" chapter.

Now, with all these women - their idiocyncracies and varying personalities, things could get really intense between us but, we were a family and we always managed to work through our issues. When the seniors graduated and elections were held again, I was totally surprised when I was nominated for president. At first I thought, "They aren't fooling me. I know there's just no one else who wants to do it," but then, I found, I wasn't running alone. I then figured, "Hey, maybe they know something I don't. If they have that much faith in me, I should probably have that faith in myself." So, I became president. Our VP? A girl I got along with, but we never really saw eye-to-eye.

It worked out well and much better than I ever anticipated. Because we didn't have a lot in common, she kept me on my toes and forced me to see things from a different point of view. There were many times when she would frustrate the hell out of me, but we'd push forward and get the job done. One trait we did share was our drive to complete things. We never let anything sit and I'm sure that's what got us off of our probation so quickly. We had a really good year together and finished up all of our requirements (including hundreds of service projects, which were really the best part, in my opinion), so that we could successfully bring over a fresh line the spring of our senior year.

Most of my sorors live within, no more than a 200 mile radius of each other. They find time to get together for lunches and dinners and I truly miss that camaraderie. I would have loved to have been there with them, but in my present condition, it wasn't happening. The VP of our line did send me pictures, which really made me miss them more. I thought about how different we probably all are, after ten+ years. The pettiness factor that can be so prevalent through young people would be virtually nonexistent now, and we could really enjoy ourselves without all the drama. As I scanned through more pictures, I was also surprised to see how we'd aged. Some well, while others, not so much. Mortality certainly catches up with you. One of the things I know blows their minds is that I'm a mother. Not because I didn't seem capable of being one in college, but because I'm not maternal at all. So many of my sisters had that in spades and, indeed, became mothers. The ones who aren't are nursing or teaching (close enough).

It will be 2007 before I can join them for any sort of homecoming event and I'm sure things will have changed even more. I hope they keep up with the communication. You know, there's really no excuse with all the methods we have now.

Memories - (a) I'm a Delta so, yes. I partied (but not well). I've always been one that needed to go to bed. When we'd throw parties, they didn't really get crunk until around 12:00 am (way past bedtime). So, I'd work the door, then go mingle and greet, then come back to the door. By 3:00 am (last call), I'd be barely conscious. It was pitiful! We'd count up the money, I'd go back to my room (dorm room, yes), shower off the smoke and weed smell, then crash. I'd be no good the next day, walking around in a daze. I preferred our parties on Fridays so that I could have Saturday to be a zombie, but they were usually Saturday night. Then, I'd drag my 3 hours worth of sleep butt to church on Sunday. Not good.
(b) I had sisters who could drink a sailor under the table. They'd carry big gulp cups around filled with some sort of scary concoction, then pass out at the first available room (also, not good). I can remember one of my sisters calling me at about 1:00 am on a Saturday (you know I was sleep) asking me to go and get, we'll call her "T", "She's been drinking since 6 this evening and nobody can get her to go to her room." So, I drag myself out of bed and find her staggering around the dorms, looking like a typical drunk and convince her to take her but back to her room. "T" is now a professional who is married, owns a home, has a daughter and is pregnant with her second. When she's not working at her full-time job, she teaches aerobics. My, how things change!
(c)My best friend never pledged a sorority, but she became a Delta by association. If we were out together, people just assumed that she was. She was always quick to let them know that she wasn't, for fear someone might try and test her with some secret or something. It had it's benefits for her because she adored the Ques (Omega Psi Phi) and hugs are given out liberally from Ques to Deltas. She considered making a pin that said, "I"m not a Delta, but I'll take a Que hug." It was because of this association that she let go of her fear of college parties and started going with me.

Anyway, we decided to go to this party together at this hole-in-the-wall club, not far from campus. In fact, I think we walked there. The club probably had 800 square feet total, including the bar, dance floor, dj booth and surrounding tables. My guess is that we had broken all the fire codes because there were soooo many people inside. Everyone was pressed up against each other and sweaty as hell. We were having a fine old time when suddenly (you guessed it!) someone decided to come up in there and start shooting. So, I did what any sane black woman would do. I headed under the table with my friend. As we waited for the door to clear, we looked over to see another guy under the table with us. We were like, "This is so crazy! Do you think they got him?" He was like, "I don't know." Then we started wondering about the security and where the bouncer was, then he busts out, "I am the bouncer." We laugh about this, even to this day.